Our Family

Our Family

Monday, December 26, 2011

10 days home

Just a quick recap of what has been going on the past 10 days.  Life has been crazy the past week with family in town for Christmas and what-not.  Randy went back to work last week, he had plenty of time at the fire station to take off, but does not qualify for FMLA at the hospital, so he has to return to both. 

Sleep for Dasha is still an issue, but has been getting better.  Instead of getting up at 1 or 2, she is sleeping until about 4:30 in the morning now.  Then we go in, rub her back and tell her night, night. She cries for about a minute and then is quiet for around 30 minutes.  Don't really know if she is sleeping or not, but is quiet.  I don't know if she wakes up and realizes that she alone or what, but she doesn't like it.  This usually goes on until about 6 or 6:30.  This morning though I was so tired that I brought her in to bed with me at 6:30 and she went to sleep until 8.  Any suggestions on this would be great.  I don't know how much more I can handle 4:30 wake up calls. 

There have been some pretty big tantrums, the biggest being yesterday.  There are definitely territory issues between the kids, and she got mad at Camden for taking one of his new toys away from her, which led to a 30 minute fit.  She got so angry that she bit herself.  Then she was really mad.  Don't know if she will do that one again.  Does anyone know, she definitely knows what No means, and melts down every time I tell her no, were they constantly told no, or never told no?  I have a spot in the living room where she throws her fits, where I can see her where ever I am. 

Baths are still not a favorite thing, she cries the whole time, but doesn't fight it.  She clearly says mama, dada, and ball. 

I have to limit how much she drinks because she will drink the entire cup at one time and then 30 minutes later we have a major mess on our hands.  One positive though, we are down to one yucky diaper a day though!

She did very well with the concept of Christmas.  She got into the tearing of the paper, and playing with the new toys.  Overall she is doing well. 

She understands commands such as
come here
sit down
let's eat
do you want a snack
do you want a drink

sorry no pictures this post, can't find the camera post Christmas disaster.  Also sorry if the post makes no sense, I am so tired!


  1. It all sounds pretty normal to me! The drinking thing goes on. . .Aidan STILL wants to drink his entire drink before eating. . .and is then usually too full to eat! So, we have to limit how much we give him at one time. Start off small is what I suggest and then add more after she eats some.

  2. Drinking is very normal...our two bio boys still do this. We usually give water with dinner and then milk after so they actually eat, but I also agree a small amount and then more later works, too. Also, our social worker (from the home study) suggested co-sleeping for several weeks once home to form attachment. We did it with both of our boys when they were born, so we will probably do it once home for a few weeks and then move her to a pack and play in the room for a few weeks and then into her room. If she's sleeping so well through most of the night though, I don't know, but it might help with attachment if you're open to it. Sounds like she is doing extremely well though and I'm glad you made it through Christmas! Take care!

  3. I feel for you. I remember how exhausted I felt and trying to figure out this little person. It's like having a newborn with a strong personality and the ability to drive you crazy :)
    We went through sleeping issues with Grace after she was home for about 6 months. She started waking around 3 or 4 am and we would do the going in and out of the room thing trying to get her to sleep. We ended up bringing her in bed with us and she would sleep. She then started waking earlier and earlier. We started having to bring her into our bed around midnight. It lasted about 2 months max. and then all of a sudden she didn't wake one night and it was over. I don't remember if we tried any tricks. I think it is good for attachment but I do know that it can be a very difficult habit to break. I would try the pack n play in your room first to see if she just doesn't want to be alone. I don't sleep well with a third person in the bed :)

    As far as bath time goes, have you tried a snug tub? That worked with Grace, but we also filled the tub and just let her lean over and play with the toys. My son was terrified of baths, so we let him play in the snug tub without water during the day. What about letting her play with water in a bucket? The more fun water becomes to her, the more likely she will want to sit in it. Dasha may just not like it and may not be happy with all the changes right now. Grace was (and still can be) a major control freak. She wants things her way a lot! I have no idea if they were told no in the orphanage, but I would guess that they were. I think these babes seek to have any control of their lives that they can. They had so little control and then they go overboard on us:)
    Dasha has had her world turned upside down. Hang in there. I promise you it gets easier. Grace put us through the ringer! Merry Christmas!!!

  4. I don't know much about getting kids to sleep. Is she taking a nap during the day? Maybe it needs to be shortened. Oliver doesn't normally use a pacifier, only when we are traveling and he needs to be quiet when falling asleep. Maybe that would help comfort her when she wakes up in the early morning. Our first few weeks home I put Oliver to sleep with some light music on...the orphanage is a lot louder then our homes. He couldn't sleep with us because he was much to restless and no one would be getting any sleep!

    Bath time, that's something I know about! I really wanted Oliver to enjoy the water. When we were in Moscow we had some bath time lessons. http://tylickadventures.blogspot.com/2011/02/tub-is-not-torture.html If you scroll around last February's posts you can read about what it took to get him comfortable with the bath. I think letting him take a bath with his clothes on was a huge help. I also got in with him the first couple times...fully clothed as well! Also, just standing at the side of the tub and playing with stuff in the tub, sort of intriguing and totally no pressure to get in might help.

    As for our travel gear...we don't plan on carrying any large sums or money around or doing any electrical converting in the near future, so whenever is fine with us. I have a friend in town the upcoming week but maybe the week after would be good. Of course you guys are welcome to come over and play...when you're ready!

  5. Our son wouldn't sleep in the start, so we carried his bed in to our room, there he slept for 12h or more without any problems, then once he had been home for 6Months he wanted to sleep in his room, so first he slept some nights on the sofa in his room and the we moved his bed back in there... Even after all that it took him a good month or so to start sleeping in his room as well as he slept in our room...
    We also use music to get him to settle, it works really great...

    We also have the same problem with drinking, we give a bit in the start and as we eat we'll give him a bit more, and no straws...

    Tantrums, biting... All very familiar... We had to do holding with our boy in the start, he would just run after us and hit and kick, bite.. you name it he has done it... It has got a lot easier, but we still have some bad meltdowns...

    That no, and having a meltdown after that, we have just made sure he stops what he's doing, as we have said no, and then a lot of praise and telling him he's a really good boy, that we love him. And explaining why. But it's not easy, our boy can't take been told off, and almost always has a bad reaction to it.
    So when you figure out some good tips, please tell about them... =D

  6. Since Dasha's been used to sleeping in a room with other children and probably with a noise level much higher than your home, I can understand that she might wake up in the middle of the night and be uncomfortable. Believe it or not, when Robyn worked on the ship, she had trouble sleeping at home the first night or two when she was on vacation because it was TOO quiet. Sounds like other folks have given you some good advice. If you can handle it, the pack and play in the bedroom with you and Randy might be worth trying for a short time.

    My guess is that things will get MUCH easier once you can settle into a routine after the holidays. Dasha's been through a LOT of changes the last two weeks. It may seem like forever especially when you're not getting enough sleep, but it's less than 2 weeks since your family day! Hang in there. We are praying for peace and REST in your house.

  7. Ok. The water thing. Vera would scream bloody murder. I had every intention of doing the water intro like Trisha but it didn't fall into place. Once we got home, we did water play with bowls in the kitchen. I let her play and play and I played with her, and she got wet in her clothes and laughed and laughed. I simply would fill a large bowl and brought over her stacking cups which doubled as bath toys. We played like this for three or four days. Then, I filled the bathtub with maybe 2 - 3 inches of water and sat her down. She screamed until I brought in the water stacking cups. I then started playing with them like we played with the bowls and she realized it was the same fun. After that, I couldn't get her out of the tub! She LOVES the water now!

    Sleep, not sure I can be much help there as Vera slept in her bed all night long from the first day home. I do know this though.. she needed the room sans nightlight and quiet. Some nights she would fall asleep in my arms during her bottle (she gets one bottle each day at night, filled with 1/3 pediasure and the rest 1% milk) and other nights she will not fall asleep until after we rock and I lay her down and leave her room. I didn't realize she liked a pacifier until a month after we got home when my niece was born. She saw it and went straight for it. Now, I let her have it after her bottle.

    The first 3 weeks contained a few tantrums with regards to toys and food. If my nephew was eating what she was eating. A meltdown of epic proportions would ensue. But she worked it out and after that happening 3 maybe 4 times, it stopped. I think she realized there was plenty of food for everyone. The sharing toys. She still is somewhat territorial, but no meltdowns.. just whiney I don't want to share stuff. I do know that she would not like my "NO" when I had to tell her that the first few weeks, but I also think she was learning boundries and learning I was in charge and not just a play buddy.

    No idea on the drinking as I literally have to chase Vera around making sure she drinks enough fluids each day.

    But like others have said, after the first few weeks, things calm down, a routine starts and that helps a TON!