A fellow blogger gave us a challenge in recent events covering the Times article that is all over the Internet and the news. As someone who has become a mom both the conventional way and the non-conventional way I have both experiences. While the cover shows one thing, the article is about attachment and bonding with your child.
I did have the experience of nursing Camden and I will tell you that I HATED it, every second of it. I agreed to nurse for 3 months and that is all I did. After 3 months I switched Camden to formula, and I don't feel he suffered at all because of my decision. I have a wonderful relationship with my son, and I love him to death and I know he loves me to death! It was almost a plus to switch to the bottle because then Randy could bond during feedings also.
I also adopted a child from another country that no one wanted. No, I am not exaggerating, she was presented to 42 Russian families, not one would even go to the orphanage to see her. She wouldn't of been there for us if one of those families had gone to meet her, they would of fell in love with her. Our attaching and bonding process is very different vs. a bio. child. Lots of hugs, cuddling, being the only one to feed them, change them, comfort them when they are hurt. That is just the beginning of the list.
So here is my list of how I am mom enough....
I'm mom enough to leave my career and stay home and do the ultimate job, where there is no pay, just hugs, kisses, and dirty floors.
I'm mom enough to take my 3 year old to Russia for 3 weeks, when he had never been on an airplane ever.
I'm mom enough to adopt a child who had cancer.
I'm mom enough to adopt a child who will always have series of Dr. appts. because of her cancer for the rest of her life, as she only has one kidney now.
I'm mom enough to admit that I did not bond or attach to my daughter right away.
I'm mom enough to keep my mouth shut when someone makes a communist comment under their breath when they find out that my daughter is from Russia and not bite their heads off!
I'm mom enough to ignore all the comments when we were in the adoption process when we were told to "buy American."
I'm mom enough to love my children unconditionally, even though they drive me nuts some days.
And last but not least, I'm mom enough to admit that I am not perfect, and I know I could be a better mom, but I do my best at the time and the situation.
1 week ago